Motherhood & Work

Now that I have been thrown into motherhood, it is finally time for me to go back to work.  No one ever said it would be easy, but I also never thought I would have such a profound effect on me.  The thought of leaving Jase for someone else to take care of just breaks my heart.  

I do not want to miss all the little things I get to experience with him as he changes so quickly, being here with him all day just makes me happy.  Of course there are days where I cannot wait for Daddy to get home because he has had enough of me, but I would not change that for the world.  I know that my mom worked & my husbands mom worked, so I just need to suck it up, I do have a good job & excellent insurance, I just work so far away.  

I hope that with this new working & motherhood journey I am also able to write more, I started this blog to help me with what happened to my mom as well as help me not be so bored when I was put on bed rest.  It seems that I just have not had much motivation to write all the time, but I am hoping that it changes.  Work brings new schedules, new wake up times, new times going to bed and a whirlwind of newness, I hope I get to share it.

Jase's Nursery

I think it is due time to also show a little of where baby Jase will eventually be sleeping.  Right now he is in mommy & daddy's room in a pack n play because sleeping is a little easier for us that way.  Plus I cannot let go of him quite yet...

It took me forever to pick out the bedding for Jase's room but I am so in love with it & the place that I got it from.  They inspired me so much & I am so happy with the way things turned out.  Polk-A-Tots Design, is where I got the bedding and such from, there are out of Alabama, I just searched on line & found them & I am so glad.  Picking out paint was a little difficult because we are trying to sell out house, I did not want to throw potential buyers off by doing something fun and funky so I just went with a very light almost purplish blue.  I wanted to do bold color & have some stripes but I will have to wait until we find out if we can sell before I do all that.  With all that said here are some picks of his room.

Crib from Pottery Barn/Dresser from IKEA

I have added some pictures & I am still waiting on a few more to arrive.  Once I get those I will post more.  This is the dreaded recliner that I had such a huge deal with.  It ended up not being nearly as bad as I thought it would be, plus the fabric is uber soft!  I am also waiting on some fabric for the window treatments, due to the possible sale I had a hard time deciding what I wanted to do there, but it is so bright in his room something needs to be done.

Jase has Arrived

My sweet baby boy Jase arrived March 21, 2011.  I would like to write about my experience because thinking back, I never asked anyone about labor, what it would be like or anything and no one felt the need to give you that type of information.  Hopefully me writing about it will help someone not get as freaked out about things as I did.

It all started that Friday before really, my head started to hurt, like a faint headache so I took some medicine to see if that would help out.  It slightly made a difference but I woke up that Saturday with an even bigger headache, one that throbbed, felt like I could feel my heartbeat in my head.  Jason & I were supposed to go to his brothers for some birthday celebrations, both mine & his and then Lauryn's, but I could not make it to them because, as the day went on, my head did not stop hurting, I even took a 3 hour nap & that still made no difference.  We went and bought a blood pressure cuff to see if that was the problem and every time we checked it, it was high.  We decided to wait and see if I still had the headache Sunday & then we would call the doctor.  I always remember that they said if I had a headache that lasted over 24 hours to call.  This one was well over 24 hours.

So Sunday it was still throbbing even more than before, so we called the doctor, knowing we would end up in the hospital, thinking it would just be for observation & then we would get to go home.  The doctor on call did want me to come in & be monitored with blood pressure & they ran some blood work.  Everything looked good besides the blood pressure, it was consistently high.  So after being there for maybe an hour or so, the doctor comes in says that you know since you are having such a bad headache and you are at 37 weeks, which is full term, there is no reason to keep this baby inside you.  So for the safety of him and myself she decided that it would be best if I was induced.  

I heard that and do not really think it set in until she left the room, I looked at Jason & was like holy hell this is happening isn't it?!  We are about to have a baby!  I thought I would be happy, but I just busted into tears freaking out.  I was saying how much I was ready but when it was time I freaked out.  I guess it was because everything was unknown, you know, I knew nothing about what was going to happen.  Nothing prepares you for this.  So we called everyone & let them know, no need to panic because the doctor said that most likely nothing would happen until the next day.  

Once they got me admitted and into one of the labor & delivery rooms, I freaked out and had an emotional breakdown again, not sure why, it just kinda happened.  We had to get my brother to come sit with me for a while so Jason could go get my bag & get the dog put up and taken care of.  A couple of hours later they put gel on my cervix which was to help it loosen and let us know that in the morning around 6am or so they would be giving me the meds that put me into labor.  Thankfully we had a night to try and get some rest.  Try to rest would be the correct way to say that, it is hard when you are anxious about what is happening. I would suggest to get as much sleep in that time was possible!

Labor & Delivery Room

The doctors work on a 24 hour rotation so we kept asking who was going to be the next one on call, but no one knew right away.  That Monday morning, who walks in the door but my FAVORITE doctor!!!!  How exciting is this, that he would be the one who was most likely going to deliver baby Jase - Dr Miller!  So they started the meds & now it is just a waiting game.  I am still having contractions, but they are not bad a level 5 I would say, not to bad & of course I had no clue what they would be like in the end.  After the meds and a couple of hours later, the time is now 1pm, Dr Miller comes in a breaks my water.  He explains that this would most likely start things going much quicker.  Boy was he right, my contractions began to get much faster & much, much more painful.  Due to my blood pressure I was unable to walk the contractions out & I had to just lay there and take them, they were so unbearable at times I didn't think I was going to make it.  I was thinking that I might not need to do an epidural but boy was I wrong, I could not wait to get one!!!!  I finally got to a pain level of about 12, the scale is from 1-10, so I asked the nurse if she could check me because you had to wait until you were 3cm dilated before they give the epidural.  Thank god I was there, it maybe took 5min for the dr to come in but it felt like forever, I guess when you know relief is in sight you just can't wait to get there!

Before epidural

After the epidural things went so much smoother, I felt better, I was able to talk & carry on conversations and just relax.  Before I was tense, not talking, just wanting this to be over.  I would suggest to anyone to get the epidural!  A couple more hours went by & I felt this feeling like I had to poop very badly, just pressure.  I asked the nurse what this meant & she said well let me check you again, because usually that means you are ready to push.  I was like okay, so she checked & I was almost there, Dr Miller soon came in to check on me, he said in about 15 min we are going to start pushing.  They all left the room & I got Jason to clear everyone else out of the room & then it was just me & him sitting there waiting.  I freak out again, and he is just going back & forth & back & forth.  He could not understand why everyone said we are about to push & then they all leave the room.

After the epidural

So at 5:15pm I began to push.  Man this was hard, I mean there were times where I could not catch my breath, I wondered being a former smoker, how women who still smoked could breath like this.  I guess in certain situations you just do it.  There was one point where I just didn't think I could, then my awesome dr gave me a pep talk & it was back at it.  After a couple more times I asked how much longer, I had maybe been pushing for 20 min, dr said maybe 3 more contractions.  I am thinking okay, cause I am thirsty, tired & really just want this baby out.  The next contraction BAM!!!!! he was out, I had full motivation on a diet sun drop & I needed it fast!

Right after birth

The new family

So that is my story, it was an amazing, wonderful awesome experience that any family is blessed to have.  Never did I think it would be anything like it was, but I will never experience anything like it again, unless of course I choose to have another baby.

Frog Overload & I loved it!!!

So I have not written in a while because I have been taking this bed rest thing very seriously, and have been trying to keep off my feet.  It is a little yucky outside today & I feel like blogging.  I recently had my baby showers & they were so much fun, plus it was nice to see everyone who I have not been able to see in a while.

Frog Cake by Ella Art Bakery

This was the cake for the shower, so cute & matched the invites so perfectly.  I give great thanks to Jenna, Lauren & Susu for such a sweet shower & taking the time out to think of all things FROGS!!!!  This was only the beginning of the frog overload & one of the main reasons I wanted to share with everyone this shower experience.

I registered at both Babies-R-Us & Target.  I decided I wanted everyone to have a chance to get something even if they did not have the time to go to a specialty baby shop.  What I learned from that experience, is that Target does not update the baby register's very well.  I received about 50% of the same little frog outfits that everyone was so proud of & while I loved them, I felt bad because you know how people want to be original & not get the same thing, but under those circumstances it could not be helped.

These were the onesies of choice

So when you are registering just be careful & be prepared that you may get multiple things, but returning was a breeze and I had no issues with any of that.  

Moving on there were two items in particular that I want to point out.  All of us at my job are very creative  people and two gifts stood out.  One was a cute way of getting the same outfits from above just in a total different way than I would have ever thought of.  Rhonda took the onesies and wrapped them up to resemble cupcakes, then took little pins with baby Jase's name spelled out & stuck them in the top.  It was just the cutest thing ever, so creative.

This is what the gift looked like

I also received another gift that was very cute & personable because of the fact that I am on bed rest.  I hate to say it I have not even started to work on it, but I am thinking about it today since it is so yucky out.  I have tried in the past to do scrap books & managed to make one, but that is about it, but when I got this gift it made me want to start doing it all over again.  Kate from work put together the cutest scrap book for me to get started with (and boy does that make you motivated).  She put together several pages, with me just having to add pictures, what a wonderful idea and a great memory keeper.

While I loved all my gifts and seeing everyone at my shower these were just some thoughts I had about a couple of things that stood out to me & have inspired me to be a little more creative with gift giving as well.

No post

I have not posted anything for a while because I had to go back to the hospital this week due to high blood pressure.  Woke up Tuesday morning swollen and with a headache, decided I would take some headache meds and lay down to see if that would help.  The headache just got worse so I called my sister and she said I need to call the doctor.  

We get to the doctor and my blood pressure was 157/102, very high, so they sent me straight to the hospital for monitoring.  After laying down for a couple of hours they let me go and just put me on more strict bed rest.  I do plan to write about the shower that I had this past weekend, and share about the one I am having this weekend as well, but for now must get feet up.  Sometimes you really need a laptop.

Glider

So yesterday I let Jason, my husband, read my new blog and he said you know you told them about your bedding issue but you failed to tell them about the chair and that was an even bigger issue.  Well, I wanted a glider, rocker whatever to help when I am up in the middle of the night feeding and whatnot.  I had been to all the baby stores & found some of the styles that I liked but was not to keen on the fabric choices, see when you go with somewhat custom bedding you kinda have to be picky with the rest of the fabric also.

After my solo searches and after talking to a couple of other people on where that got theres, we decided maybe we would just try a regular furniture store, instead of a specialty baby store.  We started off at La-Z-Boy because we both thought this would be a great place & great quality chair that would last us a long time.  Found some we liked but I was not completely sold, I needed to check all other options.  We went to a couple of other stores but all the prices where just outrageous, not going to spend that on a chair.

We ended back at La-Z-Boy and come to a conclusion on a chair and some fabric.  Well once I got home, I looked online at the fabric on the chair that we picked out and almost had a heart attack!  It was hiddiuos, ugly and would have stood out in the room like a sore thumb.  I remember that the sales person said that we could not return the chair once we received it, so I am freaking out.  In tears I call Jason over and let him see it and he is thinking the same thing that I am, but will not leave me to believe that.  So he tells me that he will call in the morning and see what he can do, because once we looked at the receipt it says no return, exchanges or cancellations.  Great I am stuck with this ugly chair that I hate and that I really did not want in the first place but I was trying to make Jason happy.  

He calls the next day and of course they will not cancel the order however we can come back in to pick out a different fabric.  So, you have an angry, upset customer and you will not cancel the order, come on now we just purchased at 4:30pm on a Sunday, like the plant that build them is even open.  Anyways stuck with the chair I spend the majority of the next day upset in tears because I HATE what we picked out and don't really think another fabric will make me happy.  We go back up there and pick out different fabric which is amazingly soft and I think with a little design help from myself we will be able to pull it off.

Moral of the story, don't order anything custom from La-Z-Boy unless you really know you want it, because you are stuck with it.  Money is more important to them than satisfaction.  Take your time to and don't be afraid to spend a little more money if that it what it will take to make you happy, after all you are the one who has to use and look at the thing on a daily basis!

Crib Bedding

Oh the hassles of crib bedding.  I guess the fact that I come from a design background I was not happy with all the bedding out there.  As much as I love frogs, I was not planning to dedicated baby Jase's nursery to a pond or even frog land.  While searching all I found where themed bedding, nothing that would stand out & make him and his nursery different from everyone else.  Like it would really matter, but to me it made a huge difference.  Being my first I NEED everything to be right, especially with all that I have been through.

I decided to take my searching to the internet & found this lovely little place called Polka Tot Designs!  I could customize the fabric & use whatever the heck I wanted to.  While it was pricey, to me it made a huge difference to have his nursery stand out.  I knew I wanted blues & greens and had already ordered paint samples to look at and base some of the bedding on.  

I found these awesome, fun, funky prints that I just fell in love with....  As soon as they come in and the nursery is finished I will post pictures

Giraffe blue & white

Doodle baby blue

Mayflower pear

Introduction

My husband & I are expecting our first child and I have recently been put on bed rest due to high blood pressure.  I decided I needed to do something to keep me preoccupied while I wait for this little boy to arrive & thought why not start a blog.  I have had many things happen that would be nice to write about.

In August of 2010, I was working part time at IKEA as a kitchen planner.  One day out of the blue I just noticed that something was not quite right with me.  I was tired all the time & taking naps any chance I could get.  This was odd for em because I normally don't sleep well.  After work one night I decided that I would stop by and pick up a pregnancy test, I had not been taking my birth control since March, so something said maybe I should try this.  As funny as this is, I also picked up a pack of ciggs and a six pack of beer because I thought no way that I was pregnant.  I went home took the test & just about lost it when I saw the two pink lines show up.  For some reason Jason was not home yet, I do believe he was visiting his family that night so he got home later.  When he got home I asked him if he would go to the bathroom & checkout what was on the counter, meanwhile I am shaking in my shoes because I have no idea what he is going to think.  He comes back out and asks, what am I looking for, so I had to go show him.  He was just thrilled!

Meanwhile I just found out that I was promoted and was going to be a full time employee so things seemed to be working out great!  Well anyone who knows me, is well aware that things just don't happen so smoothly in my life.  I feel like I am always thrown a curve ball.  My mom was diagnosed with Lung Cancer back in March (of 2010) which is the same time my father in law Tommy passed away from a sudden heart attack.  I was excited to give her such good news because she was really down and out about the cancer.  She was so happy and I could tell that I made her day!  Well in November she got pneumonia and was put on oxygen.  We thought this would just go away because my mom is a fighter and she had a new little one that was coming along that she needed to be there for.  Needless to say she passed away the week of Thanksgiving and although we were all there with her while she took her last breath I think it was one of the hardest things I had to go through, especially pregnant. My emotions where all over the place and everyone was just telling me to be calm because the baby is important and I needed to keep him safe.  Before she passed we did find out that the baby was going to be a BOY, so she did get to know that and she pegged it.  She thought all along that it was going to be a boy.  

I have had a really hard time with loosing my mom because this is my first child and she should be here for that and I want her help.  It comforts me to know that she has one of the best seats in the house though along with dad, gg, papa and Tommy.  Even though you think this would be enough, nope here I am sitting around because I am on bed rest now.  I was also diagnosed with gestational diabetes but have that under control with diet.  This is going to be a way to show my creativity and for my husband a way for me to hopefully not spend so much money.